In this madcap crazy rat race we call life; I think the world is starting to be aware of what burnout is. However, we autistics experience burnout in a different way. This is simply known as autistic burnout and it is not simple for us. Autistic burnout is the result from chronic stress in life and a mismatch of expectations and abilities without the right supports, which is characterized by pervasive, long-term exhaustion (which lasts over three months), loss of function, and a reduced tolerance to stimulus (Raymaker et al. 2020). I can say that, as an Autistic person, this has been greatly true for me.
Each Autistic person who experiences Autistic burnout experiences it differently. For me, one thing that I have noticed during burnout would get intense brain fog to the point of not knowing simple words. I also get intense anxiety about things that are less likely to happen, as well as having moments where it would be hard for me to function even with simple tasks. This will lead me to just shut down.
There have been a few things that have let be to experience this burnout. One of them includes being forced to mask my Autistic traits. There are things that I do that can be considered autistic traits, such as stimming, which has helped me, overcome stress. However, in the past, I have been greatly discouraged from doing this for unclear reasons. I would then have to mask this trait, leading me to feel autistic burnout. Another thing that led me to burnout is not taking a break when needed. I’ve always been a workaholic and wanted things to get done before their deadlines. However, I end up rushing myself by doing too many things at once without giving myself a break. This in turn, would lead me to experience a great deal of stress, and hence, experience Autistic burnout.
In my past experience, I could get burned out really badly to the point where I don’t know who I was anymore. Burnout made me feel worthless. But over time, I have been doing my best to combat it. When I get overwhelmed, I check myself and take a break, telling myself that I need this. Over the years, I have also been more confident to stim without giving it a second thought. From what I can see, no one seems to be bothered by my stimming. Despite all of this, there continue to be moments where I experience burnout and I do what I can to get through it.
I know that every Autistic individual’s experience with burnout is different, as well as how they handle it. I just wanted to show my experience as a way to show that you are not alone when it comes to this. Thank you for letting me be vulnerable and I hope you find this to be helpful.
References:
Dora M. Raymaker, Alan R. Teo, Nicole A. Steckler, Brandy Lentz, Mirah Scharer, Austin Delos Santos, Steven K. Kapp, Morrigan Hunter, Andee Joyce, and Christina Nicolaidis.“Having All of Your Internal Resources Exhausted Beyond Measure and Being Left with No Clean-Up Crew”: Defining Autistic Burnout. Autism in Adulthood.Jun 2020.132-143.http://doi.org/10.1089/aut.2019.0079
My name is Robert Schmus. I am a licensed therapist and Autistic self-advocate. I write many articles about topics affecting the Autistic/neurodivergent community, as well as my experience as an Autistic person.
